We tend to judge others based upon actions, ourselves upon intentions.
In a short conversation with Jim Butt (@JimButt3) on Friday he said "It's good to see how you've become more alive with your Christian walk in the last 2 years."
I was thankful, but also a bit stunned. Was he saying I wasn't always this forthcoming? I thought it was well known by anyone around me for very long that I was a believer. But, thinking about the period in my life when Jim and I met, I realized what he was saying. My feelings were I've been this way for years. My thoughts instantly jumped to a different period when we regularly talked about glorifying God through policies and procedures, prayed before meetings and even had people leave the company because of our beliefs. When I took someone to lunch, anyone, I'd say "I hope you don't mind but since I'm paying, we're praying." And I bought a lot of lunches in those days!
But....that was more "before" when I was a CEO with 8-10 direct reports and over 400 hundred employees. Things changed, surroundings changed, people within my daily circle shrunk. Two years ago I was trying to find myself, my dream and a new plan.
My mission has been intact; make a difference (Colossians 1:28,29) but I was struggling with how to do that in my new role. Ha! I wasn't sure what my new role was. Sometimes one day-at-a-time was just too long. I wasn't as open with my testimony as I had been. John Piper says "God is most glorified, when I'm most satisfied, in Him." I'm afraid I was not well satisfied.
But, that's when "the rubber meets the road" and one learns to put one foot in front of another, pause, pray, reflect and let life catch up. Those are the times we learn to be, in the words of John Eldridge, "alert and oriented x 5." Or not.
I thankful for these times, all times, God wants me to "....search the matters out" (Proverbs 25:2) and I know now that as much as I was worshiping Him and searching Him out before, I'm closer to Him today. God has led me through new times and my heart, soul and mind have been strengthened.
Thanks for the compliment and reminder Jim.
To that end.....blessings and God's mercy.
